Why Didn’t You Check My Pockets?

Why Didn’t You Check My Pockets?

I do most of the laundry in our home.  In fact, to be more precise, I’ve been doing the laundry in this home for more years than I want to admit.  When I was a young housewife who stayed home to raise children, I checked all the pants pockets of any piece of clothing that came my way for washing.  Every spot was sprayed with stain remover and I was careful not to mix colors with whites.  When I was a teenager, I tried to be helpful and did a load of whites for my Mom. My washing job turned out to be a dye job for all my Dad’s underwear and socks. So, for a few months, my Dad became the first man ever to wear pink underwear! Today, underwear for guys come in every color of the rainbow so I must take credit for this fashion trend.  I actually had more time as a young laundress to fuss over dirty clothes and I took great pride in how my family looked in their clothing.  Not only did I wash but I ironed too!  When a member of my family left our home, they left, looking fantastic in crisp clean clothing. What pride I had in a job well done!

When I took a full-time job outside the home, my laundry habits had no choice but to change.  A laundry attitude adjustment needed to happen fast because there was no time for ironing or checking pants pockets.  I barely had time to hit the spots with stain remover before tossing the heap into the washer.  If the washer couldn’t handle the grime, well that was just too damn bad.

The other day, I did a load of laundry and as I began pulling the wet clothes from the washer I noticed a money clip with a bunch of dollar bills soaking wet from their washing machine ride.  Crap!  I knew what was coming from my husband when he saw his dollar bills drying in the office.  “Don’t you check the pockets before you wash?”  Just let it go I said to myself, move on, it’s not worth a fight. But then, the worst thing possible happened, I washed his wallet.  That’s right; HIS wallet goes for a carnival ride in the washing machine.  CRAP!    The first words out of his mouth “why didn’t you check the pockets?”  I stood there glaring at him and thinking to myself what is wrong with you girl? Speak up! Who cares if what comes out of your mouth starts an argument!”  I say to him with just a touch of snarkiness “it’s not my job”.  “If you put your laundry in the hamper, then you need to check the pockets first!”  His response, “you should always check the pockets, my mother always did.”  That’s about the time when the words started flying out of my mouth and I couldn’t stop them.  “I’m not your mother!  It’s your bleeping responsibility to check your pants pockets before they go into the hamper.” “It’s not my job.”  He stood there staring at me as if he suddenly didn’t know who I was.

Have I learned my lesson?  Of course not!  I did a load of laundry last Sunday and low and behold I see an object staring back at me in the washing machine.  CRAP, CRAP, CRAP!  A computer memory stick is lying there wet with all the information on it gone forever.  WTF!  Why does this shit only happen to me?  I walk into his office to tell him the wonderful news.

Why do I beat myself up over these little errors that happen to millions of women every day?  Why am I a perfectionist with some things but could give a rats ass about other things?  Most importantly, why doesn’t this shit happen to him???

Due to the fact that I’m “laundry challenged,” my husband decided to become the captain of the laundry.  He’s actually very good at it and I’m sure he checks his pockets before throwing them into the washing machine. Did he take on this duty to preserve his worldly possessions or was this a scheme on my part to get out of doing the laundry?  I’ll leave that answer to my readers.

Comments (13)

 

  1. Kookie says:

    I was born after WWII. I lived in Belgium as a kid, one of my chores was to get water from the community water pump,no running water in the house.Hot water had to be boiled on the coal stove. My mom would wash clothes in a round metal tub(used as a bathtub as well)she would use her scrub board to get the dirt out. My dad worked in the coal mines,his clothes were black from coal dust. My mom’s arms were black after she got done washing. When we came to the USA (legally),I remember when my mom got her first wash machine with the wringer attachment. I use to operate that, got my fingers caught in it a few times. LOL

  2. Bruzzy says:

    I was a bachelor dad during the inflationary 70s. I washed on Saturdays and folded on Sundays. Then my rent tripled and I had to move. The moral of this information is to beware of inflation.

  3. Mom says:

    I HOPE THE COMPUTER CHIP, WITH ALL THE ” LOST ” INFO ISN’T THE ONE FROM MY PHOTO FRAME !!!!! BECAUSE NOT ONLY HAS ” HUBBY ” TAKEN OVER THE LAUNDRY, HE’S GOT A BIG JOB REPLACING ALL THOSE OLD PIC’S !!! LOL

    I REMEMBER THE PINK SHORTS / SOCKS THAT YOUR DAD WAS NOT TOO HAPPY ABOUT, LOL

    WHAT YOU DESCRIBE HERE IS A DAILY OCCURRENCE FOR MOST WOMEN,AND IT’S IRRITATING AS HELL, AS MOST OF THE STUFF LEFT IN POCKETS, BELONG TO HUBBY !!!

    I RATE THIS A 5

  4. Sandy says:

    Both my husband and my children have at one time or another had to wear pink underwear and other assorted pieces of apparel. It didn’t hurt them. Now they have to do their own. LOL

  5. Nikki says:

    I used to run into the same problems with laundry. I would mostly find kid stuff, hair ties, random necklaces and bracelets and sometimes candy. But on the rare occasion that either one of them left money in their clothes and it went through the wash we never fought about it. The reason being, if they leeft it in their pockets, they usually had forgotten it was there at all. So any money or other valuable items became mine. No fighting, no arguing, just shopping!

  6. kinilani says:

    Nikki, you have enlightened me about money and laundry! What was I thinking, drying out his wet dollar bills where he could see them? I should have hidden them and not said a word. That would have been the snarky thing to do!

  7. kinilani says:

    I don’t know Sandy, I think it may be too traumatic for dudes who must wear pink undies…lol

  8. kinilani says:

    Mom thanks for the “snarkiest” rating! Take the advice from Nikki, keep whatever valuables you find. It’s their tough luck if you become rich from their stupid mistake…..yeah!

  9. kinilani says:

    Bruzzy you’re correct inflation sucks!

  10. kinilani says:

    OUCH Kookie! Beware of ringer washing machines…lol

  11. Thank you for sharing the details. I found the information very helpful.

  12. kinilani says:

    Potato Vodka thanks for the reply and please remember to “Check your Pockets!”

  13. Well thisis cool info, will have to try it. By the way, the link is broke. Can you please help? Thanks once more for putting this up. I certainly loved every part of it.

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